Jocko has always said:
“Few things actually matter. Align your energy and your will on the things that do.”
I’ve thought a lot about that idea. Especially when trying to sort through the endless noise, distractions, and priorities pulling at me from every direction.
And recently, I was reminded of one of the best examples I’ve ever witnessed of someone living this principle: my dad.
When I was young, I remember my dad sitting on the couch or at the dinner table, enjoying a cold beer. Sometimes, I was even the one sent to go grab it for him. He wasn’t a drunk. He didn’t have a problem. And honestly, it was such a small part of our life that I barely remember it.
But then one day, he just stopped.
I didn’t notice it at the time. It was only years later that I asked him why.
He told me about a moment on his drive home from work. My dad worked a hard, physically demanding job. That particular day, as he was driving, he kept thinking, “I can’t wait until I get home and can have a beer.”
With that thought in mind, he pulled into the driveway and walked into the house, heading toward the fridge.
But as soon as he came through the door, I ran to greet him, eager to tell him about my day. I wrapped him in the same big hug I gave him almost every day when he got home.
And in that moment, he felt a tinge of guilt.
He realized that on his entire drive home, he’d only been thinking about the beer waiting for him and not about how excited he was to see his kids.
He didn’t like that feeling.
So that was it. He stopped prioritizing a drink after work.
He’d still have the occasional beer at social events, but it was rare, and never his first priority again.
I’ve always been amazed by that story. My dad refocused immediately on what actually mattered. He didn’t make a dramatic announcement. He just quietly shifted his priorities, because he decided his energy belonged elsewhere.
As leaders, in business, in families, in life, we’re surrounded by things vying for our attention. Stress. Deadlines. Recognition. Ego. Comfort. Habits that feel harmless but slowly become the focus of our thoughts.
The challenge is to identify the things that truly matter and to relentlessly prioritize those over everything else.
For my dad, what mattered most was his family.
For each of us, the answer might look different. But the principle is the same:
- Are we letting distractions steal our focus from the things that truly matter?
- Are we willing to make immediate changes, even small ones, to realign our actions with our priorities?
- Are we brave enough to admit when something insignificant has crept into the center of our thoughts or routines?
My dad taught me that it’s never too late to shift your focus.
Few things actually matter. Align your energy and your will on the things that do.
Because in the end, that’s what real leadership looks like.
