Why Do They Matter?
If you’ve ever wondered how to communicate in a relationship, then you’re in good company. This question is one of the most popular questions surrounding relationships online. That fact should clue you into how poorly we’ve been taught to navigate relationships of all types and the work required to get it right.
The biggest mistake people make with communication in a relationship is thinking about it as a one-sided transaction. What is in this for me? How can I convince them? Why won’t they listen to me?
We’re all guilty of it, and it keeps us from actually doing the thing we want: communicating effectively. Communication is a two-way street, and it requires both parties to listen, understand, empathize, and respond. If you aren’t actively listening, you’ll never be able to get what the other person is saying. This means you’ll fail to see their point of view, and your response will be truly one-sided. If you want to know how to communicate better in a relationship, it starts with detaching from the emotions and your ego and investing in the other person.
We are tribal people. From the dawn of man to today’s modern societies, we are wired to work with and rely on other people. From our families to our co-workers, there is an intrinsic belief that when we do things with others, everything is better.
Think about your relationship with your partner or children. Are you united around a common goal? Do you trust that a person will carry out their part of your relationship? Is there evidence to support that? For many of you, the answer is yes. For some of you, there might be some no’s in there. That’s why understanding how to build trust in a relationship is important.
What Are Interpersonal Relationships?
Unsure of what an interpersonal relationship is? You’re not alone. One of the most commonly searched-for phrases in Google on this subject is, “interpersonal relationships definition.” This means people don’t understand what an interpersonal relationship is. Here’s our definition for you: the trust, respect, influence, and willingness to listen between two people.
How you were raised, your familial situation, your social upbringing, all of those things affect the way you view interpersonal relationships today. For some of us those relationships were principle-based and led to a healthy and objective view of the world. For others, we learned not to trust, that we have to do it all on our own, and that no one is coming to help us.
As adults, we have a beautiful opportunity to redefine the definition of interpersonal relationships. How? By recognizing that we get to choose those relationships, we can build them on core principles of trust, respect, understanding, and working toward a united goal. Repetition is the key to truly understanding and implementing the framework. Just as it takes time and repetition to learn and internalize the definition of interpersonal relationships, it also takes consistent practice and reinforcement to fully grasp and apply the principles.
We’ll cover how to develop interpersonal relationship skills shortly, but for now, it’s important to acknowledge while other people have the agency to do as they will, we have the same level of agency to know how we’ll act. The path to developing great interpersonal relationships is ownership. Whether you’re at work or at home, ownership will give you the clarity and mindset you need to learn to trust in the relationships all around you.
How does ownership help? Taking ownership means understanding that you are in control of everything in your life. You’re not beholden to or stuck with the response anyone else gives you. You have ownership over your emotions, your mind, and your body. You can detach from an emotional situation, old embedded beliefs that keep you from moving forward, and the way you react. Ownership is the freedom to act for yourself and control your outcomes.
Interpersonal Relationships at Work
Interpersonal relationships at work are no different. Many of us have deep and wonderful relationships united around the common goal of our organization. For others, we might feel our co-workers, leadership, or cohorts are actively trying to undermine us for their own good. At Echelon Front, we’ve seen the entire spectrum of organizations and know that both realities can exist, and often at the same time.
So, how do you navigate these murky waters? Ownership. How can it be that simple? Because the moment you recognize that you are in control of every aspect of your life, including your work situation, things shift for the better. You learn to support your leadership by going above and beyond. You learn to build relationships of trust with the people you couldn’t rely on because you know that at the end of the day, serving them is serving the greater good of your company. You detach from your emotions and set aside your ego for greater success at every level.
Ownership is the key to success, but you can take it to the next level by learning to develop interpersonal relationship skills.
Develop Interpersonal Relationship Skills
Believing that some people are born with interpersonal relationship skills, and others aren’t is a limiting belief that holds you back from the results you want. The truth is that any skill can be learned; you just need to rely on the right teacher. That’s why we’ve developed a relationships course to help teach these important skills to people just like you.
At Echelon Front, we’ve impacted and worked with millions of people just like you through our best-selling books Extreme Ownership and Dichotomy of Leadership. We’ve interacted with tens of thousands of people at our leadership conferences and leadership workshops.
Echelon Front is the premier [leadership training company] on the planet, and we can help you learn to develop rich interpersonal relationships that carry you to greater success in your business, your family, and your personal life. Sign up for our relationships course today.